Our words must uplift—no corrections, no “You know better…,”simply uplifting narratives. We can use our words wrongly by sermonizing, giving a moral lesson, or having an attitude that reflects that you are judgmental and simply want to accuse the person of knowing better, manipulation, or attention getting. We too often try to respond to chaos with logic. The fact of the matter is that there is no logic in a person whose heart is broken. Logic has little meaning when chaos rules our life. The caregiver’s chore is to find a way to help the person regain peace, not convince a person of right from wrong. Work on groundedness and moral interactions will follow. Our moralistic comments can be true, but irrelevant. Our task is to keep a sharp focus on making sure the person feels safe and loved and is slowly developing this memory with us. The key in all of our interactions is to keep the strongest possible focus on making sure that the person feels safe and loved. As this memory gradually filters into the heart, slowly but surely, the demanding attention-getting and overbearing manipulation will disappear. Our knowing something bears little weight as an argument to get a person to stop misbehaving. Words have little power when we are in a chaotic state. Making choice can be nerve racking when life is topsy-turvy. Self-determination only emerges as a person becomes grounded in feelings of being safe and loved. It is meaningless without groundedness. Likewise, self-control can only evolve once a person is grounded.